Loud, Tuneless and Thick: The Sex Aids

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Destroy peace and freedom!

The Sex Aids were formed as a one off side project of a joke side project (Chaotic Dischord) of a real band (Vice Squad). Their lone piece of sonic torment was 1983's "Back On The Piss Again!" EP released on the lovely Riot City Records. It's a three song stomper and includes an appropriately sloppy rendition of Motörhead's "Road Crew" plus two originals.

Shane Baldwin details how the band began as well as the story behind the (still) unreleased track "Lady Diana Married A Spanner":

I can't deny that it was total self-indulgence, but I also think we were aware that we were not only signed to a major label [EMI] but had our own indie label [Riot City] that we could make use of. Without ever saying so, I think we all knew that we were in a very lucky position, and that it couldn't last forever, so we decided to make the most of it with side projects like Sex Aids.

Me and Dave [Bateman, also of Vice Squad and Chaotic Dischord] used to drink in two pubs in Hanham called the Swan and the Maypole with a group of friends called The No-Hoper's Drinking Club, and the original idea was that these guys would play on, first, the "Lady Diana" track, and then the single. Trouble was, none of them could actually play anything. So then we decided that it would be, essentially, Chaotic Dischord, but with us all swapping instruments. So we did that for "Lady Diana," but the results were diabolical. It was dire so we never did it again. So for the single it was really just Dischord with Igor singing. Or something like that!

Igor did one of those readers' charts in Sounds and put the "Lady Diana" in that, so that's how people heard of it. It was actually recorded for one of Garry Bushell's Oi! albums, but he wisely turned it down. I certainly didn't blame him!

I don't think I even have a tape of it. So, I don't even know if the track still exists. I'm not joking though, it really was bloody awful.


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